Carlton Supporters Club

Social Club => Blah-Blah Bar => Topic started by: Lods on May 28, 2021, 12:45:58 pm

Title: Footy Jokes
Post by: Lods on May 28, 2021, 12:45:58 pm
My wife just asked Google to tell her a joke.
Google replied

Q: What's black and white and black and white and black and white.
A; A Collingwood player  rolling down a hill. ;D

(didn't say they had to be good jokes ;)


When in Rome
A little boy from Melbourne had gone to Rome on holiday with his family hoping to see the Pope. Anyway, a couple of days after they'd arrived, the Pope was doing a tour of the city in his Popemobile. The little lad was a bit worried that the Pope wouldn't be able to pick him out in the crowd, so his Mum said "Don't worry, the Pope is a footy fan, so wear your Carlton jumper and he's bound to pick you out and talk to you."

So, they're in the crowd, but the Pope-mobile drives past them, and stops a bit further down the street where John Paul gets out and speaks to a little boy in a Collingwood jumper. The lad is distraught and starts crying. His Mum says "Don't worry, the Pope's driving around tomorrow as well, so we'll get you a Collingwood jumper and then he's bound to see you."

The next day arrives, and the boy's got on his new Collingwood jumper. The Popemobile stops right by him, John Paul gets out, bends down and says to the lad "I thought I told you to f*** off yesterday!"


Title: Re: Footy Jokes
Post by: tonyo on May 28, 2021, 05:27:26 pm
Q: What's the definition of optimism?
A:  A Carlton supporter who won't book holidays until October, 'just in case'......
Title: Re: Footy Jokes
Post by: Baggers on May 28, 2021, 05:58:49 pm
Bloke with a serious brain defect so requires a new one and goes to the brain transplant ward (suspend reality for a moment!!) and is shown a selection of brains available and their prices.
"This one is priced at $25,000."
"Wow, whose brain was it?"
"A neurosurgeon," the transplant doc replied. "And this one is $35,000."
"Sheesh, whose brain was that!"
"A nuclear physicist. And this brain over here is $120,000, our premium brain, it belonged to a Collingwood Foodball Club supporter."
The sick bloke asked, "Holy mackerel, how come so expensive?"
"Unused."
Title: Re: Footy Jokes
Post by: PaulP on May 28, 2021, 06:27:06 pm
Baggers, I've heard that joke in relation to politicians. It's one of those "mannequin jokes" that you can dress and redress at will, depending on who your target is at the time. I think I heard it in relation to Malcolm Fraser.