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Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4290 –
Lost my mum at 53 ... man, that was tough.  Was in a very foul mood for months.

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4291 –
Quote from: capcom on
Lost my mum at 53 ... man, that was tough.  Was in a very foul mood for months.

Feel for you mate. My dear and much loved mum went at 59 after a cruel battle with cancer. I was gutted, long story, and took a long time to recover. Life never really looked quite the same after that.
Reality always wins in the end.

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4292 –
EB1, mate, of little consequence but my heart goes out to you, Mrs EB1 and your brother-in-law & family. This is an extraordinarily unfair stress and pressure to be placed under... not only financially, but morally. Not to mention the psychological/emotional toll.

(Love the Italian quote from GTC about every home/family having its cross to bear. I'd take that a step further and suggest that every individual has her/his cross to bear. And only individual accountability and responsibility (which requires courage/honesty) will give us the clearest understanding of how best to deal with our troubles... because, for starters, we'll learn our part in our probs).

I can relate to your horror story, on a professional level, as I found myself on two separate occasions in the past few years embroiled in very near exactly the same situation. Both occasions they were Greek folks and both occasions there was a cultural expectation to bail out family who'd made poor business decisions or failed to have a plan B for tough times or built the business on vulnerable foundations. Amazing how some folks can start spending the money of the wealthier family member, a kind of entitlement, and it's exactly that attitude that got them into the cr@p in the first place. Both my clients were self made millionaires... their siblings/other family members, not so much. Let's not get into sibling competitiveness/jealousy/rivalry.

Long story short, both my clients were (and still are!!) ripper folks with loving hearts for other family members. And their loving hearts had been taken advantage of on a number of occasions. We devised an ethical strategy to give them the loan underpinned by accountability, honesty and responsibility... strings attached, strings that would teach them integrity and business acumen. I won't go into the details -- far too lengthy -- but suffice to say it was a strategy that gave repayment and responsibility and transparency the best chance. Then we sailed the expected rough seas of push-back, anger and guilt manipulation.

As I explained to the guys, people who get an easy bail-out cannot be relied upon for repayment and you're setting yourself up to be an easy target for their next financial failure. Accountability and responsibility (strings) ensured a line in the sand/very reasonable expectation. Give a person a fish... bla bla bla. And if they refuse the conditions of the loan... well, that's their decision.

EB1, if I can be of any help in this at all, please don't hesitate to PM me.
Only our ruthless best, from Board to bootstudders will get us no. 17

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4293 –
Quote from: cookie2 on
Feel for you mate. My dear and much loved mum went at 59 after a cruel battle with cancer. I was gutted, long story, and took a long time to recover. Life never really looked quite the same after that.

Never did to me @cookie2 .. kissed her goodbye as I went off to work, 12 hours later, brain aneurysm. I was inconsolable.

 
 

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4294 –
Quote from: capcom on
Lost my mum at 53 ... man, that was tough.  Was in a very foul mood for months.

Can relate CC old mate, lost my mum at 51. Bowel cancer. (think I've shared this before). A feisty, highly intelligent, red-head. That was 34 years ago and I still miss her to this day and chat to her regularly.
Only our ruthless best, from Board to bootstudders will get us no. 17

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4295 –
Quote from: cookie2 on
Feel for you mate. My dear and much loved mum went at 59 after a cruel battle with cancer. I was gutted, long story, and took a long time to recover. Life never really looked quite the same after that.
Quote from: capcom on
Lost my mum at 53 ... man, that was tough.  Was in a very foul mood for months.
@Cap and Cookie......sorry to hear about the early passing of your mothers, way too young. Mums get taken for granted sometimes and you really miss them when they have passed.

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4296 –
Quote from: Baggers on
Can relate CC old mate, lost my mum at 51. Bowel cancer. (think I've shared this before). A feisty, highly intelligent, red-head. That was 34 years ago and I still miss her to this day and chat to her regularly.

Lost count of the number of times when I wondered a fast or a lingering passing would have been better.  40 years later, still no answer @Baggers ... but sincere thanks to all of you :)

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4297 –
Quote from: capcom on
Lost count of the number of times when I wondered a fast or a lingering passing would have been better.  40 years later, still no answer @Baggers ... but sincere thanks to all of you :)

Gotta be honest mate, I wonder if any difference matters. We did get to say good-bye but witnessing the horrible decline and wasting of such passionate and beautiful person still haunts me. And even though we knew the end was coming, when it came it was a massive shock and a heart-wrenching loss, a void never to be filled. I felt the same with my dad only 8 months ago. Even though he was a pr1ck in so many ways, love looks beyond behaviour. I apologize for any sorrow indulgence or sanctimoniousness.
Only our ruthless best, from Board to bootstudders will get us no. 17

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4298 –
The last few posts hit a nerve with me.

We lost dad at 56.  He was unlucky.  Liver failure as a result of chemo that was to prep him for a bone marrow transplant.  Went from stabilizing red and white blood cell balance and generally looking all good with his chronic lymphocytic leukaemia to feeling like his insides and had been burnt, and subsequently hospitalised in two weeks.  Turns out a human can survive about a month total without a functioning liver. 

We carry a piece of our loved ones with us everywhere we go.  You don't get over it, you just get used to it is the best way to put it. 
"everything you know is wrong"

Paul Hewson

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4299 –
My old man was 75, and even that was too early.  Felt a little silly (and selfish, knowing others lost theirs much earlier) being a middle aged bloke, feeling sorry for himself that he lost his dad, but that’s how it felt and still does.  

Still, to this day (7 years later), reach for my phone to call him, when something happens with the Blues.  JSOS’ game in the ruck last week would’ve lead to a 20min phone call!!

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4300 –
Quote from: Milhanna13 on
My old man was 75, and even that was too early.  Felt a little silly (and selfish, knowing others lost theirs much earlier) being a middle aged bloke, feeling sorry for himself that he lost his dad, but that’s how it felt and still does.  

Still, to this day (7 years later), reach for my phone to call him, when something happens with the Blues.  JSOS’ game in the ruck last week would’ve lead to a 20min phone call!!
When my Mum passed away I would grab the phone to ring her months after to chat about the kids or something happening at work as she was always interested and then realize that call wasnt going to be possible so I feel for you not being able to share with your father.

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4301 –
Quote from: Baggers on
EB1, mate, of little consequence but my heart goes out to you, Mrs EB1 and your brother-in-law & family. This is an extraordinarily unfair stress and pressure to be placed under... not only financially, but morally. Not to mention the psychological/emotional toll.

(Love the Italian quote from GTC about every home/family having its cross to bear. I'd take that a step further and suggest that every individual has her/his cross to bear. And only individual accountability and responsibility (which requires courage/honesty) will give us the clearest understanding of how best to deal with our troubles... because, for starters, we'll learn our part in our probs).

I can relate to your horror story, on a professional level, as I found myself on two separate occasions in the past few years embroiled in very near exactly the same situation. Both occasions they were Greek folks and both occasions there was a cultural expectation to bail out family who'd made poor business decisions or failed to have a plan B for tough times or built the business on vulnerable foundations. Amazing how some folks can start spending the money of the wealthier family member, a kind of entitlement, and it's exactly that attitude that got them into the cr@p in the first place. Both my clients were self made millionaires... their siblings/other family members, not so much. Let's not get into sibling competitiveness/jealousy/rivalry.

Long story short, both my clients were (and still are!!) ripper folks with loving hearts for other family members. And their loving hearts had been taken advantage of on a number of occasions. We devised an ethical strategy to give them the loan underpinned by accountability, honesty and responsibility... strings attached, strings that would teach them integrity and business acumen. I won't go into the details -- far too lengthy -- but suffice to say it was a strategy that gave repayment and responsibility and transparency the best chance. Then we sailed the expected rough seas of push-back, anger and guilt manipulation.

As I explained to the guys, people who get an easy bail-out cannot be relied upon for repayment and you're setting yourself up to be an easy target for their next financial failure. Accountability and responsibility (strings) ensured a line in the sand/very reasonable expectation. Give a person a fish... bla bla bla. And if they refuse the conditions of the loan... well, that's their decision.

EB1, if I can be of any help in this at all, please don't hesitate to PM me.
Check your PM's Shaneo...

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4302 –
Quote from: Milhanna13 on
My old man was 75, and even that was too early.  Felt a little silly (and selfish, knowing others lost theirs much earlier) being a middle aged bloke, feeling sorry for himself that he lost his dad, but that’s how it felt and still does.  

Still, to this day (7 years later), reach for my phone to call him, when something happens with the Blues.  JSOS’ game in the ruck last week would’ve lead to a 20min phone call!!

Don’t feel selfish mate. Your dad is your dad and even though the longer you have them the more grateful you are when they are gone the loss is still hard regardless.

I lost mine at 61 from Bowel cancer 15 years ago. I was 33 at the time which I still felt like a kid and wondered how I would cope without him. He was by far the biggest influence on my life.

Sad to see so many on here loss loved ones to cancer. My mum had breast cancer at 33 and my wife had it at 23 and again twice in her 30s. Watched my father in law who was an amazing man die at home from It as well.
craphouse illness that changes your life forever whether you survive it or not and in many ways.

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4303 –
29 cases today and we have had lockdowns or restrictions for the last month.
2012 HAPPENED!!!!!!!

Re: CV and mad panic behaviour

Reply #4304 –
Quote from: madbluboy on
29 cases today and we have had lockdowns or restrictions for the last month.
At that rate this one will last 8 months
2017-16th
2018-Wooden Spoon
2019-16th
2020-dare to dream? 11th is better than last I suppose
2021-Pi$$ or get off the pot
2022- Real Deal or more of the same? 0.6%
2023- "Raise the Standard" - M. Voss Another year wasted Bar Set
2024-Back to the drawing boardNo excuses, its time