Re: General Discussions
Reply #1316 –
Understand where you're coming from, GTC old son. But the problem with stereotypes is they pigeon hole and reduce certain groups of people to strict behaviour patterns, which is unfair, naive, wrong and ignorant. I use the word 'ignorant' not in a condemning/critical way but more in a 'not knowing' sense.
There are sliding scales in just about every particular 'race rituals & traits', religions, genders, sexualities and so on. We tend to categorize according to the more fundamental or most rigid or popular understanding of these human groupings.
The best man at my wedding was Jewish. Most of my father's clients over 66 years as a landscape architect were Jewish. So yours truly has had a lot of direct connection with the Jewish community... all my life... and these people vary in many ways, just like Christians, Muslims, and agnostics and atheists! My best man loved his bacon, was not great with money, however he and is family did the Shabbat every Friday night and I was invited from time to time as the gentile - some Jews kinda look down on the gentile, most don't. Great feed. Beautiful ritual. But the conversation was just like any family on a Friday night, just like church going Christians after church on a Sunday (plenty don't go to church) or Muslim folks kneeling and praying toward Mecca 5 times per day...
When someone uttered not to long ago about 'privileged' white males many of us were up in arms as many of us aint privileged, though I do get the sweeping generalization that being born a white male has given us a head start on many other folks - a fact. Point is many of us didn't like being stereotyped in that way as we sure didn't feel privileged.
Most domestic violence is perpetrated by men, but many more men are not violent to their kids or significant other.
Another example relating to my own bigotry recently on this forum. I made a sweeping generalization about Neanderthals (the popularly regarded, denigrating stereotype) which David (DJC) quickly corrected and explained how sophisticated they were in some important respects.
I think it is a very positive thing that we take the time to get know people as individuals before making judgements based on 'popular' and conditioned stereotype judgements... and understand that there is a sliding scale of behaviour within these groups.
Appreciate the time taken in the post above but my view on this is totally different and hence my time on forums may be limited in the near future as this stuff has gone too far IMO.
As a person of ethnic background, in the setting you describe above where you were invited to your friends house, if you were with my extended family at the dinner table, you would here plenty of "stereo typical" comments about us Italians all made in good humour. Nothing offensive (in my view) or racist or deragatory towards other groups/communities, just anecdotes about us growing up "our way" versus others. These anecdotes and jokes are about things like eating, food, going out clubbing, getting married, living with a partner but not marries, children out of wed lock, all stuff that we laugh about today. And if you joined in the conversation or laughed along with us, no one would bat an eyelid. I would be comfortable in applying the above to every family member, friend or acquaintance that I know of similar ethnic back ground. Let me be 110% clear with this statement, I AM REFERRING TO PEOPLE I KNOW PERSONALLY.
So I hope I have demonstrated how someone in my shoes finds all this very difficult to grasp and understand.